How I Meditate

It’s early on Saturday morning. I’m sitting in front of the fire with a cup of coffee (my body would rather it be tea – anything with a little less acid than coffee). Gustavo is sleeping in the bedroom, and I’m up early to study anatomy and movement terminology for today’s training. I sat for what ended up being a 15-minute meditation when I woke up this morning at 5:30. (I’m an early bird.) It got me to thinking about people who are convinced that they can’t meditate because they don’t have time, can’t sit still, or think it’s hard, weird or new-agey. In fact, you will likely find your mind is quieter, focused and more alert and your body is able to cope with stress after regularly meditating.

I don’t remember having clear preconceived ideas or judgments like these about meditation – thinking I couldn’t do it. I went into it with an open mind when I started taking yoga classes in 2004, because it was part of the yoga practices with my teacher. Regardless, the benefit of the meditations kept me coming back. I’m more accepting of situations that present themselves; I’m calmer, less stressed, more loving, happier and generally more at peace. My mind also concentrates much better and my thought s are clearer than when I’m not meditating. My excuses for not practicing lately have been somewhere along the lines of not having a good enough space to meditate, not having time, feeling too tired, and just flat out not being interested. I imagine others have a variety of reasons, too, for why they do and don’t meditate. It will come (back) to you when you’re ready.

As I found out in undergrad, research has confirmed what the yogis of ancient times already knew. Expansive physiological and psychological changes happen when we meditate, “causing an actual shift in the brain and in the involuntary processes of the body” (Yoga Journal).

I keep telling myself that I’m not an authority on meditation (or yoga), because I am not a scholar learning all there is about either one; because I haven’t quit my day job and pursued the true study of what these things are to me (yet). But, you know what? Screw that. I’ve been doing this for more than six years now; I know something about meditation and yoga!

I wanted to share my sitting meditation routine. Of course, there are a variety of meditation styles – from guided meditation to worship to sitting alone. I feel like my practice – unguided at home – allows for an ease into the meditation practice; it’s more comfortable than just throwing myself on the floor, crossing my legs, closing my eyes and trying to not think. I can connect with myself on a physical level as well as emotional and mental – all very important in understanding and listening to your body’s holistic needs.

This is a guide to how I meditate. Make changes or create your own routine as you are comfortable.

1. Find a comfortable spot in your home. Or office, or wherever you may be. For the sake of a consistent practice, I’ve been told by teachers that it’s best to have a space dedicated to practice but, honestly, I don’t have a dedicated space set up (yet). If you would like to go this route, my suggestion is to find a small table, shelf or altar and place meaningful items on this alter that you can focus on during your meditation: candles or incense, pictures of loved ones (or a guru), a plant or something living, and/or other items of devotion and anything else you feel is important to you. Create relaxation, but keep it simple. I also like my space to be very warm, or else I’ll wrap up in a blanket.

2. Take your seat. I prefer to sit on a meditation cushion, but the edge of a throw pillow or a folded blanket also works well. Your knees should be lower than your pelvis in order to help create a tall, straight spine, assisting gravity with the pull. I find that sitting on a cushion gives my hips the lift they need to achieve this. You can sit any way that is most comfortable for you. I also went through a phase where I sat in virasana (hero’s pose) on a yoga block, which was actually pretty comfortable. Your body should be relaxed, and your hands can rest sweetly on your knees or thighs with palms closed or open.

3. Get rooted. Once you’ve found a comfortable seated position, keeping your eyes heavy and spine straight and stacked, let your sit bones energetically sink into the earth. Get grounded in your seat. Sometimes, lifting the flesh on each side of your sit bones (your rump) if you need to so that you feel these bones on the pillow or cushion. I like to imagine that my sit bones and legs are growing heavy roots that crawl deep into the earth, stabilizing and pulling me into my seat. This allows me to sink into my meditation space, become grounded, comfortable and focused. If you’re comfortable with simply knowing you have a comfy, sturdy seat, then roll with that. Again, this can all be personalized.

4. Let your eyes fall heavy. Soften your gaze to the floor until your eyelids gently close. Keeping eyes closed, take a couple of breaths: an inhale, a longer exhale; an inhale, a longer exhale. (Note Exhale longer than your inhale; that will engage your parasympathetic nervous system, which “switches off” the nervous system to calm a stressful state and anxiety.)

5. Set an intention or dedication. Once in a while, I’ll devote my meditation to opening my heart or mind, to forgiving, or to simply illuminating more of my soul. Occasionally, I dedicate my meditation practice to a friend, family member, teacher, someone I know who is suffering, or just someone or some thing that I want to honor or give thanks to. A traditional yoga dedication: “May all beings be free of suffering, and may my practice in some way contribute to their happiness.” This is a personal choice and one that you don’t have to observe.

6. Check in with your body. Next, I do a mental body scan to acknowledge pain in my body and also areas that are feeling really good. This also reminds me to be gentle with and honor my physical body. Our bodies really do so much for us! Keeping your eyes heavy and your seat rooted, check in with your body. Start at the crown of your head and move downward, acknowledging any discomfort, pain, tightness, knots, energy and/or comfort. Move slowly down to your forehead, eyes, sinuses, lips, jawline, ears, neck and so forth – all the way down and out through your finger tips and in between your toes. I really love this part of my practice, I think because it creates such an awareness and allows me to acknowledge and respect myself.

7. Focus on your breath. (This is what I consider to be the pinnacle of my meditation exercise.) Inhale quietly through your nose and exhale audibly through your mouth, with your tongue on the roof of your mouth, gently touching your front teeth. Again, inhale, and exhale even more slowly than the inhale. Stay focused on your breath. If you find your thoughts wandering toward work issues, what to have for dinner, whether your presentation bombed, or you hear distracting noises, simply bring yourself back to your breathing without judging yourself for straying.

One practice that helps me to stay focused on my breath (and to stay in a meditative state) is to say a mantra for a few minutes. This allows me to establish a rhythm as well as open my heart and mind to whatever comes up in my practice – feelings of fear or happiness, to just accept those feelings and allow myself to feel. A mantra could be as simple as “I am illuminant, and I am the path of kindness.”

The iPhone has a great app called Meditator, a terrific tool for starting and ending your meditation sessions (with an interval alert, if that helps) and a variety of sounds to act as the alert at the end of your sessions. It also has an ambiance option with sounds of the ocean, forest, river, storm for “white noise”. I’ve used this tool a few times and found it to be pretty handy.

I don’t always set a time that I have to sit for – that doesn’t always work for me. Some days, I let myself sit until I can’t sit any longer, and each time a thought comes to mind or sidetracks my breathing, I quietly, sweetly bring myself back to my breathing. I am surprised at how quickly the time goes and how focused I do stay on my breathing. The longer my meditation routine remains constant, the more I do establish a length of time to meditate; for myself, the goal is to work up to sitting for 20-30 minutes at a time. Not easy as a beginner, but definitely within reach if a practice is maintained. And the reward is definitely worth the work.

Meditation shouldn’t cause you to feel unreasonably stressed or physically uncomfortable. There are a lot of amazing articles and books on meditation and different types of meditations (walking, standing, sitting, reclining, savasana) and methods. Meditation does amazing things for the human brain, for chronic pain, depression, anxiety and variety of other ailments. I encourage people who are even a little bit interested to practice for 5-10 minutes per day for two weeks and see how you feel!